gone for a while

In less than an hour I'm leaving for the airport.
Very excited, lovely to be able to go to the land of OZ one more time.
I managed to get my weight down to 62.5 kg. Waistline 72 cm.
Which means I'll be able to fit into some summer clothes that have been hanging in my closet for quite a while.
Although en route I'll probably have to store them again.
I won't be doing a lot of workouts for a while, some walking, the food.... very non-ED a lot of the time, as I'll be staying with people and I'll just eat what they put in front of me.
Oh well, anything less than a 4 pound gain is a bonus.

Will report back in April!
See ya...

the last few days!

After a bad food weekend and the weight going up, I decided to really go for it this week. It helps when there's all kinds of food circling around my body that makes me feel a bit yukkie.
So I upped my workouts, walked a lot, ate healthy nutritious food and with 3 days left before leaving I am down to 62.6 kg and another half centimeter off my waistline.
I tried on some trousers I wasn't able to wear anymore and they fit nice and loosely. So now I have some choices.
Wish I could find a nice pair of walking shoes, will do a bit of shopping today - after yesterday's failure to find a pair. At least it will keep me moving.
And all the housecleaning helps as well no doubt. Pffff, not my favourite passtime. Dividing that up into little chunks, as I get bored with that pretty quickly.
Today is a working day, not many hours to do what I want to do, but workouts and walking whenever I can.
And maybe another few grams less tomorrow????

feels like spring

It was a beautiful day today, it felt like spring. The weather was nice and soft, and the sun had that typical early spring feel to it. I could have stayed outside all day.
But appointments made, so I needed to be home by 2 pm. And good, because I started wandering into shops and was tempted to buy a very nice silver bracelet (too expensive), a ring (too large) and shoes (too tight).
I did manage to walk for an hour and a half, didn't eat breakfast, was almost tempted to make this a fast day, but with a photo shoot at 3pm it didn't seem wise.
So I had a small lunch, went to my studio, took a lot of photo shots, happy with the work and hurried home for a quick dinner before going to the movies. That got cancelled,  a change of plan - again.
It means I have more time to work this evening, don't mind that. Maybe even get a small workout in, to compensate for the cup of coffee I had after dinner (shrimp, green beans, and a tiny bit of rice, for dessert I ate 1 boiled egg). And time to watch a DVD episode!

happy about wednesday

My printer restarted this morning! I have no clue as to why or what, just happy everything is working again.
So today I've been able to finish all of the bookkeeping. A chore every year, but done for another year.
In between I did my exercisis, 3 x 10 minutes. Pleased with that as well.
Breakfast was yoghurt/fruit smooithie with chia seeds, lunch and apple and 1 boiled egg. Not enough food, so for dinner I made a black bean, rice dish. Hot and spicy, very satisfying, but I do feel the food swelling up inside me. I haven't eaten any grains for at least a week, so I guess my body is wondering what alien stuff it has to deal with tonight? I will have to drink lots of water and hope it isn't adding to my waistline.

Today I discovered I was charged for another month of Reboot, silly me, told Dax, but forgot to tell pay pal.
I could ask to be let in for another week, but it would only be to (digitally) chat with Greg and Deb, so that doesn't make sense. Would be a big surprise to them, me appearing on the comments site.
Let's just keep that a fantasy.

I'm doing a photo shoot tomorrow. I wasn't planning on any new work, but because of the missed session on Sunday, I think I can manage some more work. I've already had 5 requests for photo sessions, and it's a pain - financially as well - to tell people I won't be doing anything till April.
It does mean I'll have to be a bit less ambitious about the number of workouts and walks I can fit into this last week.
Do more visualisations in bed then: slender, slender me!

(And Sue, thanks for the advise, I do think the printer got overloaded - I cleared everything this morning, and presto, working again!)

me saying some prayers

Today was supposed to be a copy of yesterday. But while printing some stuff for my bookkeeping, my printer stopped. And that was the end of that. Usually it starts again, but this time.... no action at all. It told me I needed to check the connections, but that's bullocks, it was working perfectly.
So I restarted and restarted, gave the wires a shove or two, and finally just sat in front of the computer for a while praying to some imaginary technical gods to save me from this.
My options now are: disconnect the printer, connect it again and hope that....? Or do I have to buy a new one?
Please, a week before my trip this is very inconvenient. Please?
Anyway, forget workouts and preparing food to take to work.
It's nice to plan a day, but when things go haywire, forget the plan.

I'm going to try the printer again tomorrow, hoping for a miracle, and I will certainly get on my knees and thank those technical gods for saving me from a lot of hassle, if the printing starts up again. One can always hope.

dusty Monday

Yep, another day biting the dust at work. It will look nice when it's finished, but meanwhile .... just hoping my sinuses won't start to clog up.
I got a lot done yesterday, thanks to the no show on Sunday I can now do my bookkeeping at ease, made a real start with that. It's something I don't like doing, so for a whole year I just throw every receipt in a box, and then somewhere in February I have to spend 2 days sorting everything, take it to my bookkeeper - a nice 40 min. walk - and he does the rest.
Then of course when the bill arrives I wonder whether I shouldn't do more myself... but no, forget that.
In between I did 3x 10 min. exercising. I was tempted to try some squats and lunges. But it means going through all that pain again, and in less than 2 weeks time I'll give up on those workouts anyway.
So I'll restart with the real stuff in April, assuming my knee will agree to that. 2 20-minute walks to work, all healthy ED food.
A good day!
And the scales agreed to that this morning.

a new week

Stayed away from the computer this weekend. That makes a change.
Saturday I went for a visit to my sister in the south of Holland. 5 Hours riding on trains. Time to read news papers, and half a book, it always feels like a mini vacation. It was raining in Amsterdam when I left in the morning, but nice and sunny in Maastricht. We went for a walk around the shops, but I decided it would be nicer to buy something new in Australia, so we just sat chatting in a cafe for a long time (coffee!).
I got back late and wanted to go home taking a long route, so I would could walk for 40 or 50 minutes, as compensation for the non ED food I'd been eating, but it was cold, so I decided to skip that and thought a Sunday fast would be just as effective.
But Sunday was a very different day from the one I had planned. I was supposed to do a portrait session, but the family (6 year old daughter who wants to do modelling work!!) never showed up. They did call later in the day to apologise, so they're not on my black list - yet. So my mind started to wander towards food... and no distractions... so I had lunch.
What to do with the rest of the day? Need to do my bookkeeping before my trip, also need to reorganise and clean my cupboards, need to start working on my website... and lots of other need to's.
I ended up in front of the television and enjoyed a couple of episodes of NYPD Blue.
It's Sunday after all, do I really need to do anything?

Monday morning, the beginning of a whole new week, and instead of hours spent photoshopping I can do more workouts, go for walks and try to lose those darned 2 pounds I have been trying to lose for the last couple of weeks. What a shame I have to go to work 5 times this week.

a scary half hour

This morning I wanted to read my e-mails, booted up the computer, saw my regular screen, but then ... I couldn't access any programs. I restarted my computer about 5 times, same effect. I started to freak out, that's the last thing I want happening, with a photo shoot on Sunday, I need this machine to work. It's work, not just fun!!!
I just kept hoping for a magic moment, needed some distraction and made myself a cup of coffee. Back again, nothing happening. I could cry.... But just when I got the technical department on the line the computer started working again. I don't want this happening too often, it was like a freak wind or a freak wave, but don't do this again, please?
My cortisol levels will stay up for a long time today.
And going to work this afternoon won't make things jollier. If it's anything like yesterday. They are putting in the tiles, there's new dust from cutting tiles, horrible noise and the doors need to be open, so it was cold. I'm almost ready to demand compensation. A free day f.i. Or better yet, a free day for every horrible day we have to endure.
All the upsetting stuff makes me forget about eating, so maybe that's the silver lining????

I'm looking forward to tomorrow already.

leaving Reboot

I cancelled my Reboot membership today. A difficult decision, mainly because I won't be able to follow the trials and tribulations of Greg and Deb, the only 2 faithfull contributors to the comments page. Funny, with over 80 members so few are posting anything.
I'm still not able to use my right knee for squats and lunges, so my main exercises are walking and cardio, interval cardio or just moving around.

Yesterday was mainly walking, going places and seeing friends.
First I went to a beautiful W. Eugene Smith photo exhibition. It made me want to have a dark room again, the black and white prints were stunning, nothing like the digital stuff we have to live with now.
Then dinner at a restaurant where there was a choice between a cheese fondue - sticking pieces of white bread in a cheesy substance - and steak. So I went for the steak. Stuck to water, as I already had 2 glasses of wine earlier in the afternoon, and there's a limit to over indulging.

a bad food day

Oh boy, it was one of those days where I made lots of bad food choices, after being diligent and determined  for weeks. Doing fasts, seeing the weight go down and then bam, it all fell apart today.
I worked yesterday evening and did an early shift today, so I was back at work at 9 am. I should have stayed over, it felt like I never even left the building.
The renovations are still going on, so 5 minutes after I got there the work crew arrived to take out the last part of the floor, so the drilling started and lasted until I was ready to leave 6 hours later. The doors needed to be open, so it was cold as well as dusty. Another hellish day at the office.
I drank some hot cholocate to get warm, I needed comfort food, so I had a cheese sandwhich (after a healthy salad, but that doesn't make it better).
Then I rushed home, to wash the dust away and went to the opening of an exhibition (a little networking included). There I pretended I never heard of ED and happily drank 2 glasses of wine and lots of salted peanuts.
Guilty after the fact I managed a long walk home.
Made a beef and vegetable stir fry and feeling I needed something extra I made dessert: baked apple slices with honey and cinnamon. And ended the meal with a cup of coffee.
I'm feeling bloated and a lot heavier than when I got up this morning.
I'm not getting on the scales tomorrow, that's for sure!

fasting - again

The fasts seem to help with the weightloss, so I'll keep doing them the next few weeks.
The determination to reach my goal seems to make them a bit easier, although my stomach is grumbling right now. I'll just have to ignore this and visualise me wearing a body clinging t-shirt. I saw a nice one in a shop window yesterday. If I manage the fast today I might go and buy it. Fingers crossed it's still there.
It's time to have a look at my to-do list for today, so far I've just been reading and writing e-mails.
It's time to put on my walking shoes and head into town to collect some photo work. Burn lots of calories.

my latest work experience

This is especially for you Sue, somebody thought I looked weird enough to take a picture and sent it to me.

I will have to wear this again when I go back to work on Friday I think, because they haven't taken out enough of the top layer of the floor, grrrr. A few more days of drilling and dust biting to look forward to.

map 2011 / results

I only followed the  workout part of the program for less than 2 weeks on account of the right knee muscle problem. I just did my own kind of exercises after that and more walks. Followed the nutrition guidelines, but also with some changes as I don't like the 3 day low carb wave.
I usually have a higher carb breakfast and then lunch and dinner will be low-carb. I also managed the fasting days, and that was actually easier than the first time. The trick is to do it on a working at home day and then go walking when I start to crave food.
My goal was to get below my plateau line, which has been 63 kg since last years' MAP challenge.
And getting on the scales this morning - with fingers crossed: YES! 62.8 kg. Well done me!
Also I've lost an inch off my hips and 1/2 inch off my waistline.
I'm very happy with the results, my goals weren't very ambitious, but still hard work to make it happen.

A high carb day today and tomorrow my next fast.
Working toward my new goal: 62.5 kg. I have one week to make this happen.

map 2011 / biting the dust

it would be more accurate to say - inhaling the dust. I sat with a cap over my mouth and nose at work. I should have taken a picture! It got a lot of laughs and commiserating. But really, it was horrible. I felt terrible the first 2 hours, the work people left around 4 pm, so 2 hours later the dust had finally settled and I was able to breathe like a normal person again.
Today will be the same story. I just hope my sinuses survive this, just before my long dreamed of trip to Australia I don't need this. I'm grumpy!!!

Back to map 2011: I got on the scales this morning: 63.2 kg. Best result so far. Even with doing my own kind of exercises and walking the weight is slowly (very slowly) going down. And my waistline is down a bit. That's good news at least.
Now back to being grumpy.

map 2011 / fasting

Today was both easy and tough. From 3pm onwards I couldn't stop thinking about food. Cakes, biscuits, tarts, soups, delicious smelling dinner with pasta or noodles. I wanted food and I craved carbs.
But... didn't have any of it. Put on my walking shoes around 4 pm and started walking. The health food store, a book store - where I bought a cookbook ?! food was definitely on my mind. I managed to stay outdoors until 6.30 pm.
Finally - time to eat! I prepared 2 tiny lamb chops in coconut oil, with red cabbage and pear + a cucumber salad. Wonderful. My belly and tastebuds are satisfied again.
As a reward to myself I am now baking an almond banana cake, from elena's pantry. It took me a whole week to get all the ingredients together. Yesterday I finally managed to find some vanilla extract, in an English food store of all places and went to a specialised oil store to get my hands on some grapeseed oil.
I just hope I won't eat the whole cake in one go.
For the record - lots of walking today + interval cardio twice.
I am really going to try and do an improvised pyramid and meltdown tomorrow.

Another workfree day tomorrow - yippee.

map 2011 / raindrops keep falling on my head

Can't get that song out of my head these days.
Sunday was an almost exact copy of Saturday. Didn't feel like cooking dinner though, so I walked to my favourite health store, an excuse for a 30-minute walk (through the drizzling rain), and bought an organic chicken salad to take to work.
Also added some wild salmon, vegetable soup and a small salad for Monday breakfast and lunch.
Managed to avoid the nut section, don't want them in my house when I'm doing my second fast.
Another 30 minute walk coming back from work, then enjoyed an episode of Mad Men in front of the television, before calling it a day. I also managed 3 10-minute cardio sessions throughout the day. So an active Sunday, after a lazy start when I didn't feel like doing anything.
Today is a working at home day, this evening I'm heading over to a friends' house for my monthly ladies dinner.
It will most likely be high carb, so to compensate I'm going to walk (50 minutes) and back again (another 50 minutes), unless ..... it's pouring again.
It doesn't look good, it's been raining all morning, and I'm humming that song again

map 2011/ still improvising

The knee is still bothering me, so I'm doing improvised workouts to keep the muscles working.
Yesterday I managed half a pyramid and even added squats,but started at 2 and went to 8. That worked. And no lunges. All those reps deep bending are out for a while.
But the spiderman didn't bother me doing a meltdown, so I'm back to doing those.
Yesterday was a fast day for me. I started to hear my stomach grumbling around 12, with 6 more hours to go not a good sign. But managed until 4.30 and then caved in, ate nuts, and way too many of them.
Ate my dinner at 6pm and added a small bowl of yogurt/fruit dessert.
I was worried it would all add up on the scales, even with all the little interval cardio sessions and walking throughout the day.
But hip hoy - the weight is down by almost a pound this morning.
I am now just under the 140 lbs line. It almost makes me look forward to the next fasting day. Well, almost....

map 2011 / restarting

I had to go to the dentist this morning and that's a 25 minute bike ride (and then back again). So this was a testcase, would my knee feel allright after the ride?
Never mind my teeth, after poking around to see if all was well, I needed a coffee to numb the feeling. I could take a pain killer, both not ED approved, so I preffered to go with the coffee.
And thankfully my knee survived, so no more excuses and need to restart my workouts. I'll start with one this evening, and tomorrow two and then build up, to 3. I'm going to be very sore again, knowing this in advance doesn't help.
Come on girl, grit your teeth and get on with it!
First though, I'm going to enjoy one hour of leisure time, before heading to my studio for a portrait session. Through the rain! again (sigh) will this never let up.....almost 2 weeks now, it's time for a weather change.

map 2011 / no workouts for a few days

I've given up on the workouts for a few days. Due to the knee problem I started doing more arms and shoulders workouts, but feeling I'm doing too much there. Maybe I'm doing the exercises in the wrong way?
Anyway, I decided I am going to take it easy a few days. I'm doing some cardio and a little walking (it's raining all day again). Then will see how my knee reacts to doing some squats on Monday, and if that goes well, slowly build up again to 2 workouts a day.
As for the nutrition: 3 days low carb doesn't sit well with me, I remember that from the first time doing map, so I'm having a carb breakfast on day 2 (a yoghurt smoothie with fruit and omega-3 seeds) - sorry Dax. The rest of the day I hope to manage the low-carb eating. And on day 3 a whole day of low-carb. See how that goes.
I'm preparing more low-carb snacks to eat if I feel hungry, so I won't get tempted to eat carbs.
This hasn't been a great map challenge for me so far, but not ready to quit.

map 2011/ new scales

I ordered new scales online a few days ago: all digital, with bodyfat measuring, bone density, water etc. The things they can make these days! Probably not very accurate, but still, good as a settting point.
Of course, this was before my knee gave out, and I saw the fat slipping off my body this month with rigorous workouts.
Got my package today, but not as enthousiastic as I was when I ordered them. Still, better than my old ones.
I tried a new workout today, from Reboot 12, called the arms race. A workout with dumbbells, all standing up, 3 exercises 100 reps each (in sets of course). It took me 14 minutes to complete, and was tough, even with the 2kg weights I use. So I'll keep doing this one, trying to improve my time + the the improvisation I came up with. And walking more, so I can still be reasonably active.
And eating ED, that didn't go well yesterday, I was hungry almost the whole day, it felt like my body was screaming for carbs, so in the evening I gave in.
Back to low-carbs today, it's been better, but only because of the carbs I ate yesterday I think.
I'll be really happy to be eating rice and beans tomorrow and yoghurt and fruit! Looking forward to it already!

map 2011 / feeling like an invalid

Somehow my right knee has become really sore. I think there's an inflammation, but not quite sure.
It does mean most of the map workouts are now beyond me. Squats, lunges, any bending is painful.
Even walking and stitting down are awkward - and this is no muscle soreness, I know what that feels like.
So I've come up with an improvised workout that doesn't involve knee bending, will do that twice a day.
And will now also faithfully fit in a first half of the mobility matrix, that's a bonus I guess.

It's no excuse to get off the nutrition part of Map. Although I do feel a bit sorry for myself and can easily see myself sitting down with my right leg elevated, watching a DVD with a box of chocolates next to me.
Oh, lovely fantasy.
It's a low carb day, so I'll be cooking my chicken, stir fry vegetables to take to work this afternoon and eat this cold, as micro-waving is not allowed.
I've eaten an egg, salmon and spinach omelette prepared in olive oil for breakfast and will have a vegetable soup for lunch.
I'm also taking an advocado an a boiled egg to work, if  I'm in need of a snack....

map 2011 / a hectic day

Saw a beautiful movie last night: Winter's Bone. I can really recommend it!
Biking home through the rain and cold afterwards - brrr.
Today has been very hectic, only 2.20 pm and I'm supposed to be finished with everything.
Which of course I didn't manage as I was working hard to meet a deadline. Did succeed doing that.
But the workouts suffered, I only got in 2 sets of ICT, half a meltdown and almost a whole 46 reps power circuit, but of course crossed out the walkouts for today (hardest, why do they have to be at the end? hardly any energy left when I start on these, I sometimes take a 10 minute break before doing these).

Food was fine - Breakfast: a yoghurt/fruit/omega-3 seeds smoothie and for lunch a very nice, hot-spiced lentil soup. Maybe added just a little too much hot chili, but good for another glass of water.
Now I'm ready to jump under the shower and head over to the train station - my cardio walk, and go to a friends' dinner party who lives outside of Amsterdam. It was planned for December, but she got the flu, now it's awkward because of  ED, but I'm not going to offend my hostess by refusing her food. So hopefully not eating much yesterday and today (so far), I'll be able to contain the damage. I have been saying no to a lot of dinners and gatherings since June last year, for fear of adding the pounds on again, but have made a resolution to be more sociable in 2011. I can easily say no to the alcohol anyway - or just have 1 glass. And plenty of water instead. Need to drink another 1 1/2 litres today.
I'll probably be back in Amsterdam quite late....

MAP 2011 / aching muscles

I woke up this morning with aching muscles, bit of a bore (to say the least). I thought working out the past few months would have saved me from this, but  many new muscles got worked I guess. A good sign I know, but not something I enjoy.
It didn't prevent me from doing all the workouts, started with cardio to get warmed up, and then through the day the rest. I wanted to finish everything early and blog as well, because I have an appointment for this evening.
I forgot how much running around to get everything done it involves, not just working out, but the shopping, cooking, taking the supplements. And writing comments and blogs (never mind reading other peoples comments and blogs). Which means I've really been slacking while doing Reboot.
Today I also opened my freshly arrived package from Bodyweight Culture with the protège bands + DVD.
I was really looking forward to that, but the DVD was a disappointment. I thought I would be able to do lots of stuff having it hooked to my door, but all the shown exercises could only be done with the bands hanging from the ceiling.
I improvised - and did some great stretches for my hamstrings, arms and back. Until I figure out how to connect it to the ceiling this will be what they're used for. My living room is slowly being transformed into a gym studio!
This day is MAP complete (except for the water, need to drink another litre) and am now off to the movies!

Map 2011 / day 2

I was really happy this morning, getting out of bed with hardly any muscle soreness. Lucky me, I thought.
Really made an effort with the workouts, 4 rounds of IC, as I only did the assessment yesterday.
A quick 10 minute cardio session at the end of the morning and then meltdown before going to work. (2x 20 min walk, more cardio).
Coming back from work I did the power circuit and felt how stiff  I'd gotten. Normally I can bend down and touch the floor with my fingers, but now I could only get half way to my calves. After 30 reps it got better, but now I'm really starting to feel my legs, mainly hamstrings. Oh boy, don't like this.
Food wise mostly it went well, although didn't feel like eating much.
Breakfast was fresh pineapple parts with a boiled egg. Then didn't have lunch, because I knew there would be a New Years' celebration at my workplace. Trays of food, but NOTHING ED. The sensible choice would have been to not eat until dinner, but... with hardly any breakfast?
So I had 2 little snacks, just to fill me up a bit.
Dinner was good, omelette with boiled carrots and a green salad. And some yoghurt with berries for dessert.
I also drank 2 litres of water, so improvement there.
Now it's late and I need to get to bed!

Measurements

My current weight is 64 kilos = 140.8 lbs
My measurements are:
4 inch above knee:       16.9"
8 inch above knee:       20.5"
hips:                             40.5"
waisline:                       29.3"
bust:                            35.5"
under bust:                  32.3"
upper arm:                  11.6"

map 2011 / day 1

I started slowly today, yesterday went to visit friends and we toasted to the new year - with Australian prosecco, very nice! But this morning I felt like walking around in a fog for the first hours, had to remind myself I  needed to do 4 workouts, and go to work, so I'd better get a move on.
I managed meltdown before lunch, but that was it.
At work I had a quiet half hour and did a power circuit (40 reps), but had to the walkout at home.
And have just finished the individual circuit, numbers not great.
I will have to do an extra set tomorrow, as I'm really too knackered to do that now.
Walking 2x 20 minutes fast paced (to and from work) was cardio.
So I managed most of it, I'm not sure if I'm going to be sore tomorrow. It doesn't feel like it, so all those Reboot workouts are paying off I guess.
Food was mostly ED, but I need too be more compliant tomorrow. And drink more water - 6 glasses today.
Still need to take the supplements. And comment on the day 1 page.
Also forgot to take measurements today, that's for tomorrow....